(This was read at his funeral yesterday)
A letter from Andrew to be read after his passing:
A brisk fall afternoon, the bright red and yellow leaves are falling from the trees at Round Lake Park, the sun is shining. I can feel the cool fresh air entering my lungs with every breath. I smell garlic and homemade Italian food in the wind. For you maybe it's a spring day and the flowers are blooming, or it's Christmas and the snow is falling and you are sitting with a warm mug of coffee by the fire. It's at those seemingly perfect moments that you know this all didn't happen by chance. It is not by chance that the leaves turn red in the fall, and it is not by chance that I'm not standing here reading this letter to you now.
After all the suffering I have seen thus far, there are only two things that I know are true. That I love my wife and kids so much, and that God loves me infinitely more than that. Thank you, thank you, thank you, to all who have loved, served, and prayed for us. I am so very sorry to leave you all behind, but at the same time I am so happy to be home with my maker. Everything that I love about the fall and the leaves and the fresh air and Italian cooking in the wind, pales in comparison with what it is like in the presence of Jesus. I have not eaten in a very long time, but know that I hunger no more. There is no more pain or suffering, no more tears or sorrow. Grace, AJ, and Gracie, know that God holds you in the palm of His hand especiallly now. Jesus will lead, guide, and protect you. I am confident that your mourning will turn to dancing.
Fight for joy in this. Rejoice because cancer can kill my body but it cannot kill my soul. Rejoice because my greatest sickness was cured in 2001 at the age of 20 when I believed that Jesus could forgive such great sins as mine. Rejoice because even through sickness and death God has done great things in my life, and yours. Rejoice because this is not the end, it is just the beginning.
Rejoice! Again I say rejoice!
I will see many of you soon.
Andrew W. Mark
(Hat tip to Kim)
Showing posts with label Suffering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Suffering. Show all posts
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Good God vs. Andrew's Suffering? Making Sense of It All
My friend, Bob Glenn, preached a sermon on Sunday reflecting on Andrew's suffering and death. It was so incredibly powerful, I wish you would take some time to listen to it. Briefly, here is the main reflection points:
And finally, on point #4:
I hope these quotes whet your appetite to hear the rest of the sermon. You can either download it here or you can listen to it live on Todd Friel's radio show, Wretched, where he will broadcast it sometime between 2 and 4 CST today. (Yes, that's how powerful the message was--it will be broadcast nationally.)
- Andrew Mark's suffering and death are a sobering reminder of the brevity of life.
- Andrew Mark's suffering and death point indirectly to the holiness of God.
- Andrew Mark's suffering and death are not worth comparing with our glorious future.
- Andrew Mark's suffering and death only make sense in light of a relationship with Jesus Christ.
On the very provocative point #2, Bob says this:
On point #3:If in spite of the heinousness of what he went through, Andrew was treated better than he deserved, and if what he really deserved was hell, and if hell is infinitely worse than any suffering here on earth no matter how severe, and if hell is as bad as God is good, then God must be awfully good.
Think of it like a number line ... make your suffering a negative number ... way across the page to the left of zero and make it a huge number--say, something that corresponds to what Andrew Mark suffered--let's say it's negative one million. Now, take that number and make it a positive number and multiply it by the number of the stars and you won't touch the hem of the garment [of] how much better it will be!
And finally, on point #4:
If life is all about knowing Jesus, if knowing Jesus is supremely worthy and surpassingly valuable, the most valuable thing in the universe, that's what life is all about--then Andrew's suffering and death helped him to know Jesus in a way that only those who suffer can know Him. In fact, that's the only thing that in the end makes Andrew's suffering and death meaningful. Through it he was able to know and enjoy what is supremely enjoyable in the midst of real pain--namely Christ Himself.
I hope these quotes whet your appetite to hear the rest of the sermon. You can either download it here or you can listen to it live on Todd Friel's radio show, Wretched, where he will broadcast it sometime between 2 and 4 CST today. (Yes, that's how powerful the message was--it will be broadcast nationally.)
Saturday, February 07, 2009
With Our Savior
via Grace's Journal by Grace Mark on 2/7/09
Its 11:30 am Pacific time. Just got a call from Grace that Andrew is now in the presence of our Father. We praise the Lord that he called Andrew to be His and that Andrew is now rejoicing before the throne of grace without pain or suffering.
Please continue to pray for Grace, AJ and Gracie and the rest of the family, that the peace of God would continue to be a comfort to them.
Details on the funeral will be forthcoming. It will most likely be on Tuesday and Grace and the family would love for whoever can make it to be there. Also in lieu of flowers, a fund will be set up for AJ & Gracie. More details on that to come as well, but if you are interested in contributing to that, please email fundforajandgracie@gmail.com and I will send you the details when I have them.
Thank you all for praying and for your encouraging remarks and for continuing to lift this dear family up in your prayers.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Encouragement for Sufferers
Hear a good word from John Piper on proper perspective through hard times. Though his subject concerns the economy, this was encouraging to me in my present trials.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Andrew's "Sooner than Later" Post
Some of you may remember posts here on this blog about Andrew's battle with cancer this year... Andrew received some difficult news regarding an MRI: the cancer has spread into other parts of his body including, apparently, his spine. If the spine in fact has a cancerous tumor on it, it will not be operable. Andrew and Grace have decided to take a different approach to this next phase. Instead of trying to find ways to kill the cancer, they are going to find ways to enjoy the quality of life he has now--to make the most of what remaining days God grants him.Please pray that they'll have great wisdom in discerning treatment methods, pain-relief methods, and moreover that God would continue to be magnified in their lives as The Greatest Treasure... for to die is gain.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Andrew and Grace Need You To Pray
This is from Andrew & Grace's blog. Please read and pray for wisdom to make the best decision evident to them.
Our family is faced with the toughest decision yet. The docs at Mayo and my radiation oncologists think that my best chances of survival are to do another surgery and remove everything - remaining part of tongue, voice box, epiglotis, etc. That would mean that I would not be able to talk, eat, or smell, and I would breathe out of a hole in my neck. The radiation oncologists at Mayo and UMN think that this cancer is radiation resistant because it didn't die with last year's radiation so they don't think radiation will work this year.
It is believed that a massive surgery would increase my chances of cure, but not by very much. We had asked Dr. Yueh to do whatever it took during my surgery in March to remove the cancer, even if I could never eat or talk again but he opted not to cut it all out at that time because seeing the aggressiveness if my tumor and how it was scattered rather than in a single mass, it was unlikely that removing everything would get it all anyways. Dr. Moore at the Mayo Clinic thinks there might be a slightly better chance of survival if I was willing to do the surgery. The only thing is that Dr. Moore at Mayo wasn't the one who operated on me, so he didn't see how the tumor was behaving firsthand. On the other hand Dr. Yueh was able to see exactly how the tumor was behaving and made a decision in the operating room based on his extensive experience.
So I have 3 options:
1) A second course of radiation and chemotherapy
2) A third surgery plus a second course of radiation and chemo
3) Seek alternative therapies such a immunotherapy, nutrition, etc.
At this time there is not enough evidence that shows that a major surgery will greatly increase my chances of survival. If it was clear that I would survive, or perhaps have a decent chance at survival, then I would definately do it. Otherwise, I'm not so sure it is worth it because of is would greatly affect the quality of life that I have left. Besides, after having 2 surgeries, radiation and chemotherapy, a third surgery could have life threatening complications.
Please pray for claritiy in this decision, and that God would heal me of this disease and allow me to be a husband to my wife and a father to my children for years to come.
I am going to start chemotherapy tomorrow anyways, and radiation starts next Monday. So I have until the end of this week to decide. I am trying to get an opinion from Sloan Kettering and MD Anderson, and asking more questions of Dr. Yueh and Dr. Moore this week. Pray that those meetings will bring clarity to the decision.
via Grace's Journal by Andrew Mark on 4/28/08
Our family is faced with the toughest decision yet. The docs at Mayo and my radiation oncologists think that my best chances of survival are to do another surgery and remove everything - remaining part of tongue, voice box, epiglotis, etc. That would mean that I would not be able to talk, eat, or smell, and I would breathe out of a hole in my neck. The radiation oncologists at Mayo and UMN think that this cancer is radiation resistant because it didn't die with last year's radiation so they don't think radiation will work this year.
It is believed that a massive surgery would increase my chances of cure, but not by very much. We had asked Dr. Yueh to do whatever it took during my surgery in March to remove the cancer, even if I could never eat or talk again but he opted not to cut it all out at that time because seeing the aggressiveness if my tumor and how it was scattered rather than in a single mass, it was unlikely that removing everything would get it all anyways. Dr. Moore at the Mayo Clinic thinks there might be a slightly better chance of survival if I was willing to do the surgery. The only thing is that Dr. Moore at Mayo wasn't the one who operated on me, so he didn't see how the tumor was behaving firsthand. On the other hand Dr. Yueh was able to see exactly how the tumor was behaving and made a decision in the operating room based on his extensive experience.
So I have 3 options:
1) A second course of radiation and chemotherapy
2) A third surgery plus a second course of radiation and chemo
3) Seek alternative therapies such a immunotherapy, nutrition, etc.
At this time there is not enough evidence that shows that a major surgery will greatly increase my chances of survival. If it was clear that I would survive, or perhaps have a decent chance at survival, then I would definately do it. Otherwise, I'm not so sure it is worth it because of is would greatly affect the quality of life that I have left. Besides, after having 2 surgeries, radiation and chemotherapy, a third surgery could have life threatening complications.
Please pray for claritiy in this decision, and that God would heal me of this disease and allow me to be a husband to my wife and a father to my children for years to come.
I am going to start chemotherapy tomorrow anyways, and radiation starts next Monday. So I have until the end of this week to decide. I am trying to get an opinion from Sloan Kettering and MD Anderson, and asking more questions of Dr. Yueh and Dr. Moore this week. Pray that those meetings will bring clarity to the decision.
- Subscribe to Grace's Journal using Google Reader
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
It's not fair!
Audrea and I have struggled recently over the seemingly unfairness of our house situation. We have never missed a payment on it. We put a downpayment on it (not 20%, but still not a 0% down). We have a nearly perfect credit score. Yet in the last year our house value dropped 17%--to a point where we now owe more on it than it's worth.
Many sellers today are taking one of two options: to "walk away" or to "sell short". (Selling short means working with the bank to only pay back part of the original loan value. In other words, if your mortgage was 150K and you asked the bank if they'll just take 135K.) The problem is, both options lack ethical integrity (unless in the latter you have simply asked for mercy from the lender).
We would never consider "walking away", but we have considered asking our lender for mercy to sell short. The problem is this: they're only doing this for those individuals who have been unable to make their payments. To Audrea and I, this seemed unfair. But if we think about it in light of this outstanding post from my friend Andrew, we simply must fall down on our knees in praise to God for His mercy in not giving us what we deserve.
Thank you, Andrew!
ANDREW WRITES:
One of the hardest parts of the day is to sit with my family and eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with them. An abundance of my favorite foods are strewn out across the table and my nostrils are filled with rich aromas of garlic, and breads, and pasta and sauces. I suddenly feel envious of others who get to taste and eat rather than having to inject medical formula directly into their stomach with a syringe. My mouth waters as I cherish vivid memories of being satisfied with a hearty meal after a long workout at the gym. Then I cringe in fear of not being able to experience that ever again. To be hungry for the rest of my life.
Can there be anything on God's good earth that is more satisfying than my wife's lentil soup or my mom's chinese cooking? Food is a wonderful thing and it used to bring me so much joy and satisfaction, but can I still have joy without it?
I struggle all day long to answer yes to that question. People often express their deep sympathy to me and say, "its just not fair that you would have to go through this. That really sucks". I often struggle in my mind thinking the same thing. The truth is that it isn't fair. My life just isn't fair.
Lets look at just a few of the facts of my unfair life.
1) Born 9/11/81 to loving parents, David and Joyce Mark.
2) My parents loved me.
3) My parents loved me so much that they never gave up on me despite my disrespect and rebellion. They always supported me.
4) I got to go to UCLA for college and experience so many things in life.
5) I became a Christian at the age of 20 and got to go to John Macarthur's church and learn so much about God through the bible.
6) I miraculously landed a job at Motorola, which I absolutely love. Going to work for me was exciting and fun.
7) I married the most amazing, beautiful, bright, caring person, aka Grace Uriarte.
8) We had AJ - the coolest kid on the block.
9) Then we got to have Gracie, sweet little Gracie.
10) Then I had cancer, but God restored me to complete health after that.
11) We got to move to Minnesota and we absolutely love it here.
12) I got cancer again and survived a very complicated surgery.
Its just not fair that I got to live richly for this long, while others die young. Its just not fair that God would sacrifice His only son so that I could be forgiven of my sins and receive life everlasting rather than perish in hell where there will be weeping and knashing of teeth forever.
Deut 8:3 says "He humbled you and let you be hungry, and fed you with manna which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that He might make you understand that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD."
When God rained manna down on the Israelites when they were starving they could only collect enough for the given day. God satisfied their hunger for a day, but He didn't provide for tomorrows hunger until tomorrow. Its true that cancer sucks because it could rob me of tomorrow. But it sure can't take away today. Joy is not found in tomorrow, it's found in today. Today I can find my nourishment in God who is my daily bread. God is making me hungry so that I might look to Him to satisfy me. Today I can rejoice because knowing God is so much more satisfying than the finest of foods.
Psalm 63:1 says, "O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, In a dry and weary land where there is no water."
The true hunger of a human being is not for food, it is for God. And only God can satisfy the hungry soul.
Many sellers today are taking one of two options: to "walk away" or to "sell short". (Selling short means working with the bank to only pay back part of the original loan value. In other words, if your mortgage was 150K and you asked the bank if they'll just take 135K.) The problem is, both options lack ethical integrity (unless in the latter you have simply asked for mercy from the lender).
We would never consider "walking away", but we have considered asking our lender for mercy to sell short. The problem is this: they're only doing this for those individuals who have been unable to make their payments. To Audrea and I, this seemed unfair. But if we think about it in light of this outstanding post from my friend Andrew, we simply must fall down on our knees in praise to God for His mercy in not giving us what we deserve.
Thank you, Andrew!
via Grace's Journal by Grace Mark on 4/21/08
ANDREW WRITES:
One of the hardest parts of the day is to sit with my family and eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with them. An abundance of my favorite foods are strewn out across the table and my nostrils are filled with rich aromas of garlic, and breads, and pasta and sauces. I suddenly feel envious of others who get to taste and eat rather than having to inject medical formula directly into their stomach with a syringe. My mouth waters as I cherish vivid memories of being satisfied with a hearty meal after a long workout at the gym. Then I cringe in fear of not being able to experience that ever again. To be hungry for the rest of my life.
Can there be anything on God's good earth that is more satisfying than my wife's lentil soup or my mom's chinese cooking? Food is a wonderful thing and it used to bring me so much joy and satisfaction, but can I still have joy without it?
I struggle all day long to answer yes to that question. People often express their deep sympathy to me and say, "its just not fair that you would have to go through this. That really sucks". I often struggle in my mind thinking the same thing. The truth is that it isn't fair. My life just isn't fair.
Lets look at just a few of the facts of my unfair life.
1) Born 9/11/81 to loving parents, David and Joyce Mark.
2) My parents loved me.
3) My parents loved me so much that they never gave up on me despite my disrespect and rebellion. They always supported me.
4) I got to go to UCLA for college and experience so many things in life.
5) I became a Christian at the age of 20 and got to go to John Macarthur's church and learn so much about God through the bible.
6) I miraculously landed a job at Motorola, which I absolutely love. Going to work for me was exciting and fun.
7) I married the most amazing, beautiful, bright, caring person, aka Grace Uriarte.
8) We had AJ - the coolest kid on the block.
9) Then we got to have Gracie, sweet little Gracie.
10) Then I had cancer, but God restored me to complete health after that.
11) We got to move to Minnesota and we absolutely love it here.
12) I got cancer again and survived a very complicated surgery.
Its just not fair that I got to live richly for this long, while others die young. Its just not fair that God would sacrifice His only son so that I could be forgiven of my sins and receive life everlasting rather than perish in hell where there will be weeping and knashing of teeth forever.
Deut 8:3 says "He humbled you and let you be hungry, and fed you with manna which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that He might make you understand that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD."
When God rained manna down on the Israelites when they were starving they could only collect enough for the given day. God satisfied their hunger for a day, but He didn't provide for tomorrows hunger until tomorrow. Its true that cancer sucks because it could rob me of tomorrow. But it sure can't take away today. Joy is not found in tomorrow, it's found in today. Today I can find my nourishment in God who is my daily bread. God is making me hungry so that I might look to Him to satisfy me. Today I can rejoice because knowing God is so much more satisfying than the finest of foods.
Psalm 63:1 says, "O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, In a dry and weary land where there is no water."
The true hunger of a human being is not for food, it is for God. And only God can satisfy the hungry soul.
- Subscribe to Grace's Journal using Google Reader
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Incredible Healing
God has provided Andrew with some astonishing recovery! He is talking which is far more than the doctors had anticipated. He was expected to go through months of speech therapy! Read here about God making the unbelievable believable.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Amazing Grace for Grace
When I read of the grace being given to Andrew's wife, Grace, in the middle of the suffering, I cannot help but weep and repent of my discontent, my unthankfulness, my lack of patience, my greed, and my stubborn and rebellious heart. Be blown away by reading her amazing testimony this morning.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Great Suffering
Back at Redeemer Bible Church in Minnesota there are a couple of dear families going through incredible suffering right now. One in particular has really been at the forefront as the husband, Andrew Mark, has been going through multiple surgeries to remove tongue cancer. He is currently in ICU and not "out of the woods" yet. Would you please pray for he and his family that God would bring him through this very difficult time?
Andrew has had an amazing testimony going into this surgery. The way that God has brought glory to Himself through this trial is truly worthy of the adjective--awesome:
Yet, in the middle of this trial, hiw wife, Grace, wrote in her blog that it seems like she is in the middle of the eye of the storm. Please pray that God would continue sustaining her with His grace. Please especially pray that her health would be protected in the middle of the physically draining process.
I have appreciated their godly response to this trial. They have demonstrated through actions and words John Piper's description of why suffering exists:
Andrew has had an amazing testimony going into this surgery. The way that God has brought glory to Himself through this trial is truly worthy of the adjective--awesome:
Yet, in the middle of this trial, hiw wife, Grace, wrote in her blog that it seems like she is in the middle of the eye of the storm. Please pray that God would continue sustaining her with His grace. Please especially pray that her health would be protected in the middle of the physically draining process.
I have appreciated their godly response to this trial. They have demonstrated through actions and words John Piper's description of why suffering exists:
The Ultimate Reason Why Suffering Exists
The ultimate purpose of the universe is to display the greatness of the glory of the grace of God. The highest, clearest, surest display of that glory is in the suffering of the best Person in the universe for millions of undeserving sinners. Therefore, the ultimate reason that suffering exists in the universe is so that Christ might display the greatness of the glory of the grace of God by suffering in himself to overcome our suffering and bring about the praise of the glory of the grace of God.
John Piper, "The Suffering of Christ and the Sovereignty of God" in Suffering and the Sovereignty of God, ed. John Piper and Justin Taylor (Wheaton: Crossway Books, 2006), 89.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Please pray...
While I didn't know Brent in a very personal way except through business contact buying books and a brief email interchange about his education at Bethel, my heart grieves for this brother in Christ. Please keep he and his brother's family in prayer. Ask that God would use this in their lives to deepen their joy in Him and that others would see the strength that only comes from Him.
Here is an update I received yesterday afternoon from him:
From: C. Brent Cloyd
To: fuller_paul
Subject: Update my Niece - Virginia Tech Tragedy
Date: Tue, 17 Apr 2007 16:31:43 -0500
Dear Brothers and Sisters:
My family and I are so grateful for your prayers. hundreds of you responded to let me know you were praying and I can assure you I read each note.
I just recieved word from my family in Blacksburg that they have posititvely identified the body of my niece Austin Cloyd.
Please be in prayer for my my Brother Bryan and his wife Renee and their son Andrew. This is a terrible tragedy for all people involved. It is very personal when it is one of your own. In times like this we need a savior. It is good to know that in times like these we have a savior. I will be going to Blacksburg soon. Please pray for all of us.
Thanks,
Brent
Here is an update I received yesterday afternoon from him:
From: C. Brent Cloyd
To: fuller_paul
Subject: Update my Niece - Virginia Tech Tragedy
Date: Tue, 17 Apr 2007 16:31:43 -0500
Dear Brothers and Sisters:
My family and I are so grateful for your prayers. hundreds of you responded to let me know you were praying and I can assure you I read each note.
I just recieved word from my family in Blacksburg that they have posititvely identified the body of my niece Austin Cloyd.
Please be in prayer for my my Brother Bryan and his wife Renee and their son Andrew. This is a terrible tragedy for all people involved. It is very personal when it is one of your own. In times like this we need a savior. It is good to know that in times like these we have a savior. I will be going to Blacksburg soon. Please pray for all of us.
Thanks,
Brent
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